tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-44917926127964003332023-11-16T05:46:35.443-05:00Art Teachers Hate GlitterAprilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00429718256691772971noreply@blogger.comBlogger145125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4491792612796400333.post-78511597289747949132014-02-04T22:03:00.000-05:002014-02-04T22:03:28.892-05:00Finalists Announced and Voting Open! 2013 Art Ed Blog of the Year<div style="text-align: justify;">
Just a quick note to let you know that the finalists for the <a href="http://www.theartofed.com/2014/02/03/finalists-announced-and-voting-open-2013-art-ed-blog-of-the-year/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=finalists-announced-and-voting-open-2013-art-ed-blog-of-the-year" target="_blank">AOE 2013 Art Ed Blog of the Year</a> have been announced. There were many, many awesome bloggers selected, and yes, Art Teachers Hate Glitter was one of them (thank you). Don't take my word for it, go check it out for yourself, but don't leave first without voting</div>
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<a href="http://www.theartofed.com/2014/02/03/finalists-announced-and-voting-open-2013-art-ed-blog-of-the-year/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=finalists-announced-and-voting-open-2013-art-ed-blog-of-the-year" target="_blank"><img alt="http://www.theartofed.com/2014/02/03/finalists-announced-and-voting-open-2013-art-ed-blog-of-the-year/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=finalists-announced-and-voting-open-2013-art-ed-blog-of-the-year" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjwqaD6ZlPqMp6ALd9hTRGS0ZphtrwgdjOg8s4V80KxKR17Hpg54DMAhz1ba7F3LPYb58c9OUYO6dl6FGbs2yOCRb-0nZzst6tPStlP0ywXAEom7TQVgm5qPeXPw-6UgxrcgnNL7q6MX-8/s1600/1st.png" height="165" width="200" /></a></div>
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I'd also like to take a quick moment to thank you all for your support, comments and emails after my last post. You made me cry, you made me laugh, and more importantly, you made me remember why it is that I do what it is that I do. Haters be damned! </div>
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I promise you, I'm not leaving for good. I just need a recharge period, and I needed to give myself permission to step away from the pressure to be funny. There are some changes coming down the line, which will all be revealed in good time (you know, after the grading end-of-the-quarter crunch is over and I've properly recovered).</div>
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Thank you, thank you, thank you for... everything. </div>
Aprilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00429718256691772971noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4491792612796400333.post-12819482786105574352014-01-27T21:36:00.000-05:002014-01-27T21:36:03.885-05:00Humor. It's Not All Sunshine and Roses. Mostly It's Not.<div style="text-align: justify;">
Here's the thing about being funny, it ain't easy. Maybe for some people it is, and I imagine those people live their lives as comedians and humor writers, but I'm just an art teacher, and truth be told, I'm not that funny.</div>
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My humor comes from a dark place. Not the darkest of places, but a dark place nonetheless. It's rooted in cynicism, bitterness and skepticism. I use humor to cope with undesirable situations. I use humor to connect with others and say the things that everyone else is afraid to say. We're all thinking it, but no one would ever actually say these things that I say. These things are bold, they're brash, a little offensive, often snarky and politically incorrect, but always truthful.</div>
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Take, for example, my <a href="http://artteachershateglitter.blogspot.com/2010/09/20-things-elementary-art-teacher-will.html">20 Things An Elementary Art Teacher Will Never Tell You</a> post. This post is, by far,<i> </i>my most popular, most visited, and most commented on post. This post put me on the map, if you will. Why? Because deep down inside, most of you, dare I say all of you, can relate to this post. At one point or another, you have thought these things, but have never had the balls to say it outloud.</div>
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That's where I come in. Safely hidden behind the curtain of anonymity provided by the big bad internet, I gather up all the balls and I say these things for you. Generally, we all have a good laugh, feel a little less alone in our deep down inside feelings, and get on with the rest of our days. Generally. Every now and again, someone who clearly doesn't belong here, whether it's because they have no sense of humor or because they aren't an art teacher, wanders over to this bog. Maybe they got lost on their way to the glitter supply store, or maybe curiosity brought them. I don't know. Regardless, they stop by and before they leave, they make sure to let me know exactly how offensive and horrible I am and that I must truly be a bad, bad person.</div>
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Most of the time I take a deep breath and forget these comments (but that doesn't mean they don't still sting a little. Believe it or not, as heartless as I am, I am still human), but lately, some comments have really gotten me down. Lately, some readers have been coming down on me not only as a person, but as a colleague. I won't get into specifics because I feel as if I would be stooping to their level (but if you're curious, I publish all comments, and you can go <a href="http://artteachershateglitter.blogspot.com/2010/09/20-things-elementary-art-teacher-will.html">search them down</a> yourself). I think the main reason these few <i>attacks</i> have hurt is because the authors have been so horribly wrong about me. I am not anything that they think I am. </div>
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I am a good person, a great teacher and an excellent colleague. I am also a blogger, and like any other blogger out there, I know how to spin my tale for the biggest impact with my audience. I don't lie, but I know how to write a piece from a perspective or in a voice that will make what I'm saying really hit home. I often do this through snarky, bitter, brash, offensive humor, but this is not who I am in <i>real life</i>. I think most of you probably get that. I hope you do. My online persona is a version of me, but it is not the me that I offline. At least not entirely. </div>
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In real life, I'm happy. I love my job. I love my students. I love my colleagues. I genuinely have very few negative things to say about my colleagues, my students or my job. At this point in time, in my current situation, I have very, very little to complain about. I am very fortunate to be in this place. I am very grateful to be in this place, but happiness and job satisfaction don't write a blog, at least not this one, so from time to time, I slip into the dark version of me and attempt to spit something out that might be <i>entertaining</i> to read. It wasn't always like this. When I first created Art Teachers Hate Glitter, I was not in a good place. I had just experienced a few years working in a couple of hostile and unwelcoming work places. Going back to 20 Things An Art Teacher Won't Tell You, I actually based that piece on those past experiences, which happened to be the <i>only</i> experiences I had working in education. I have since broadened my knowledge of what it can be like to work in education, and while yes, there is still a lot of truth to my 20 Things piece, I have also discovered that in some schools, nothing I said in that piece is true. Maybe I'll revisit 20 Things someday and write a rebuttal to it, but right now, let me get to my ultimate point.</div>
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I'm a good person, and I'm happy. Being funny and maintaining the "voice" that you've been entertained by over the past few years is becoming harder and harder to do. As I put more distance between myself and the negative experiences I've had in education, I'm finding it more difficult to get in touch with the source of my humor. Add to that the harsh feedback I've received recently, and the fact that my students have apparently learned proper decorum and are no longer<a href="http://artteachershateglitter.blogspot.com/2012/03/merda-dartista-channeling-piero-manzoni.html"> using my art room as a bathroom</a> or <a href="http://artteachershateglitter.blogspot.com/2011/02/um-so-yeah-this-happened.html">relieving themselves of their undergarments</a>, and my enthusiasm and energy for this blog is fizzling. I want to be funny. I want to draw you in and make you feel understood and less alone in the isolating position we have all taken on, but... eh...</div>
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I'm not going to give up blogging, but forgive me if my posts are few and far between for awhile. I love blogging. I love connecting with different art educators from around the world. I love hearing your feedback, and I love it when you share your painful, funny and oh-my-god-I-can't-believe-that-happened moments. I've developed numerous online relationships that I cherish, and I want to continue building on those. But... but... I need to recharge. I need to refocus. I need a moment to recover from the negativity that I've been replaying over and over again every time I sit down to write. <i>Will this offend? Am I going too far? How will this be received? </i>I just need some time to feel good about what it is I do again. Please excuse me while I take some time. Thank you.</div>
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<i><b>NOTE:</b> I wrote this prior to the AOE Winter 2014 Conference. I had a great time and truly enjoyed the conference. It felt great to interact with others via Twitter. I had a moment afterwards, in which I hesitated, and considered not publishing this, but I decided I needed to. The conference buzz is going to wear off, and in a week or two, I'll be sitting in front of the computer, stressed over not being able to write, fearful of how what I write will be received. I want to thank all of you for your positive feedback after the conference. It has helped. Truly. Thank you.</i></div>
Aprilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00429718256691772971noreply@blogger.com15tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4491792612796400333.post-22869866928326300892014-01-25T21:53:00.000-05:002014-01-25T21:56:36.831-05:00#aoeconference Twitter Moments You Missed<div style="text-align: justify;">
The people over at The Art of Education deserve a huge round of applause. A standing ovation even. I can't imagine all the work and organization that goes into putting on an event as big as The Art of Education Conference Winter 2014. The presenters were stellar. STELLAR! Technical issues aside, attending this conference was well worth it, and I can't wait for the next one. Some of you joined us at the cool kids table on Twitter to share your experience. For those of you who didn't make it, here are some moments you missed.</div>
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I'm the student, I mean, teacher, who sits in the back of the room doodling and having side convos during your presentation <a href="https://twitter.com/search?q=%23aoeconference&src=hash">#aoeconference</a><br />
— ATHGlitter (@ATHGlitter) <a href="https://twitter.com/ATHGlitter/statuses/427148383531184129">January 25, 2014</a></blockquote>
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Now this is my kind of conference! <a href="https://twitter.com/search?q=%23artsed&src=hash">#artsed</a> <a href="https://twitter.com/search?q=%23aoeconference&src=hash">#aoeconference</a> <a href="http://t.co/Z4TjkjY6WY">pic.twitter.com/Z4TjkjY6WY</a><br />
— Heidi O'Hanley (@NobleMaiden15) <a href="https://twitter.com/NobleMaiden15/statuses/427160630970564608">January 25, 2014</a> </blockquote>
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<a href="https://twitter.com/search?q=%23aoeconference&src=hash">#aoeconference</a> Power out in Ethiopia. Watching in candlelight with generator-run modem. Luckily I charged up my MacBook.<br />
— Helen Iglar (@h_iglar) <a href="https://twitter.com/h_iglar/statuses/427132384921001984">January 25, 2014</a></blockquote>
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Thank goodness you can't see me today at the <a href="https://twitter.com/search?q=%23aoeconference&src=hash">#aoeconference</a> HA! If anyone wants to tweet me with questions..GO4IT! <a href="http://t.co/YQNJCEOwzO">pic.twitter.com/YQNJCEOwzO</a><br />
— Ted Edinger (@ArtWithMrE) <a href="https://twitter.com/ArtWithMrE/statuses/427118110122848256">January 25, 2014</a></blockquote>
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fuzzy slippers, sweats, blanket, coffee and some ridiculous relevant PD!! <a href="https://twitter.com/search?q=%23aoeconference&src=hash">#aoeconference</a> <a href="https://twitter.com/theartofed">@theartofed</a> Woot!!<br />
— Michele Gorham (@mycornerny) <a href="https://twitter.com/mycornerny/statuses/427107643388227585">January 25, 2014</a></blockquote>
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<a href="https://twitter.com/ArtWithMrE">@ArtWithMrE</a> Noooooo!!! My worst fear. It's so painful, isn't it? I just hope that's not what I sound like in real life.<br />
— ATHGlitter (@ATHGlitter) <a href="https://twitter.com/ATHGlitter/statuses/427151089851314176">January 25, 2014</a></blockquote>
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<a href="https://twitter.com/ATHGlitter">@ATHGlitter</a> I think you just cursed!!!!<br />
— Ted Edinger (@ArtWithMrE) <a href="https://twitter.com/ArtWithMrE/statuses/427156498167250944">January 25, 2014</a></blockquote>
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Hope you all enjoyed the conference and were able to catch the videos you missed. I hope to have a better, more thorough recap up later in the week. Don't hold your breath. I actually have to go to work next week. </div>
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<script async="" charset="utf-8" src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>Aprilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00429718256691772971noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4491792612796400333.post-29076115314088965792014-01-16T17:27:00.002-05:002014-01-16T17:27:56.194-05:00"No one gets preferential treatment."<div style="text-align: justify;">
I was engaged in a conversation the other day* with a group of colleagues. As you do. Two coworkers were recounting a meeting they had with a parent. Nothing surprising there. During the meeting, the parent had essentially mentioned that the "good" kids always get the short end of the stick. They never get called on, and the "bad" kids, or the "problem" students get preferential treatment. My colleagues, including myself, responded as you would have expected... "What?", "That's ridiculous", "No one gets preferential treatment", "We're always fair", "Parents are ridiculous", blah blah blah. We all left the table, some of us laughing, some of us shaking our heads, all of us in a state of disbelief. And that was that.</div>
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Only it wasn't. </div>
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When I returned to my classroom, I was still thinking about the conversation. It slowly dawned on me that the parents were right! I reflected back on my own behavior when dealing with "problem" students. I was shocked to realize that I do give special treatment to those students. You have to, lest you want to set them off, right? You're taking preemptive measures to prevent any blowups. Any storms. It's for the good of the class. When I reflect further back into my career and training, I realize that this is, in fact, the trend. </div>
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I recall being in job interviews and speaking proudly of how I "manage" difficult students by giving them special jobs and calling on them frequently when they know an answer. Principals have always loved that! After all, it means less work for them, but how many "good" students did I purposely overlook or cause to feel excluded because of my behavior?</div>
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The thing is, you try to be fair, and we've heard it time and time again, <i>fair doesn't always mean equal</i>, but how can we justify giving one group special treatment when it alienates another group? I get how this trend emerged. The misbehaving, "stupid" kids felt ignored, overlooked, excluded, <i>not good enough</i>, while the "smart," "good" students received all the praise and attention. So, we tried to compensate for that by including the "bad" kids more, calling on them more, asking them to help more, meanwhile, we are now, inadvertently, but partially purposefully, overlooking and excluding the "good" kids. Is it okay to do this to any group? To make one group of students feel ignored in order to build up the self-worth of another? </div>
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I know what you're thinking, <i>"well, the solution is to stop labeling and stop categorizing students into groups and just treat everyone as equals, blah, blah, blah."</i> Sure, okay. Tell me how well that works out for you. The truth is, it's hard not to categorize students. It happens everyday, in every school setting. The moment a fellow teacher or administration gives you a "heads up" about a student, they've labeled him or her. As soon as you get that list of IEPs at the beginning of the school year, you've already grouped your students. This is the group that requires more help, more hands on interaction. I don't give equal attention to my students. The "artistic" students rarely see me during class. How many times have I dismissed the requests for help from the quiet, studious student because my back was turned on Johnny for too long and all hell is about to break lose? How many times have I walked away from a "talented" young artist because Suzie, who produces mediocre work at best, has needs that require me to give her step-by-step instruction?</div>
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So how do we find the balance? How do we build up the self esteem of those students who are lacking in talent or lacking in affection at home without dismissing the needs of the other students? <i>"They're strong and more confident, they can handle it."</i> Maybe, but aren't they then no longer getting an equal and fair education? The dichotomy of classroom learners is a difficult phenomenon to navigate. There doesn't seem to be a right or wrong answer, no clear cut solution to ensuring that every individual student in your classroom receives a fair and equal education.</div>
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<b>What are your thoughts? How do you handle "problem" students in your room? Do you give special treatment? Do you ignore "good" kids?</b><br />
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(For the record, and it saddens me that I feel I must add this disclaimer, I would never, ever categorize, group or think of students as "bad" or "stupid". "Difficult"? Yes. "Challenging"? Yes. When I use the words "bad" and "stupid" in this conversation, I am alluding back to a time when these words were actually used, so please don't hate on me about it. Thanks.)</div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><i>*This conversation took place quite some time ago, but I am just now getting around to finishing this post.</i></span></div>
Aprilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00429718256691772971noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4491792612796400333.post-35384227194259296972014-01-03T23:03:00.000-05:002014-01-03T23:03:14.296-05:00In Which I Tease You<div style="text-align: justify;">
You know what's great? Art room hacks.</div>
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You know what's even greater? When someone compiles a convenient list of art room hacks. You know, maybe something like, <b>10 Creative Art Room Hacks</b>?</div>
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Well guess what? I did just that.</div>
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But here's the thing. It's not a blog post. Oh, no siree, Bob! It's a <i><b>video presentation</b></i>. Yup. You read that right, a <i>vid-ee-oh pres-en-ta-tion</i>.</div>
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<i>"Oh where, oh where, Ms. ATHG, can I view what I can only assume will be a glorious and informative presentation,"</i> you ask? That's easy, at the <a href="http://www.theartofed.com/aoeconferencewinter2014/">Winter 2014 Art of Education Conference</a>. It's online folks, <i>online</i>. So you know what that means, right? No need to shower, get dressed, or even brush your teeth. AND it's on a Saturday this go around (unlike last year's which, while awesome, was on a Wednesday. I think. Maybe it was a Tuesday). Check out some of the fab presenters:</div>
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Theresa McGee from <a href="http://theteachingpalette.com/">The Teaching Palette</a></div>
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Greg Percy of <a href="http://www.songsinthekeyofart.com/">Songs in the Key of Art</a> fame</blockquote>
Ted Edinger from <a href="http://artwithmre.blogspot.com/">Art with Mr. E</a><br />
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Nic Hahn from <a href="http://minimatisse.blogspot.com/">Mini Matisse</a></blockquote>
Hope Knight from <a href="http://dolvinartknight.blogspot.com/">Mrs. Knight's Smartist Artists</a><br />
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<a href="http://artteachershateglitter.blogspot.com/">ME</a>! and many more</blockquote>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMtmpnClet5JdfUznZiAkjw6VZOis2sXyUxrKT0eMawhP1-WZ5DpRaCsmCMjdbL6DpYI9V1tnpZWv6Uel8UYGgWp4zMps6bG3lgVDmrXeHv3kLdZvyOzBRep0giy4Z_n7eMZa8a_rDPQs/s1600/Winter-Conference-Banner.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="160" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMtmpnClet5JdfUznZiAkjw6VZOis2sXyUxrKT0eMawhP1-WZ5DpRaCsmCMjdbL6DpYI9V1tnpZWv6Uel8UYGgWp4zMps6bG3lgVDmrXeHv3kLdZvyOzBRep0giy4Z_n7eMZa8a_rDPQs/s400/Winter-Conference-Banner.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<i>"Okay, great, but what can I </i>expect<i> from this conference, and more importantly, what can I expect from your presentation?"</i> I'm glad you asked. First, make sure you pop on over to The Art of Education's <a href="http://www.theartofed.com/aoeconferencewinter2014/">information page</a>, because all the information you need to know about the conference is right there. </div>
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Now, here's what you can expect from my presentation:</div>
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<li>Having to endure the sound of my irritatingly whiney voice for ten minutes.</li>
<li>Flashy graphics that will distract you from the lack of content.</li>
<li>Flashy graphics to distract you from the fact that you're not seeing my pasty face. </li>
<li>Tips and tricks you probably knew about long before I came along.</li>
</ul>
</blockquote>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Need more incentive to attend? The first 1,000 people to register by January 13th will receive a swag bag (full disclosure, it's actually a box). So go, hurry, get your registration in. Swag bag registration ends January 12th, but you can register up until January 23rd. </div>
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<i><b>Hope to "see" you there!</b></i></div>
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</div>
Aprilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00429718256691772971noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4491792612796400333.post-41004929994813740052013-12-03T23:33:00.002-05:002013-12-03T23:37:37.553-05:00'Tis the Season for Not Caring*<div id="lyrics_text" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><img class="rg_i" data-sz="f" name="xmfPhUq5U9gRgM:" src="https://encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQWLMzAEXmZrPotEeaPgk8Au3rUtSgOPv5HdrqIZGwnSAJUAGGOoA" style="height: 124px; margin-left: -4px; margin-right: -3px; margin-top: 0px; width: 110px;" /> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">'Tis the Season for Not Caring*</span></div>
<div id="lyrics_text" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: x-small;">(To be sung to the tune of Deck the Halls, obviously, but make it the Wednesday night drunken Karaoke version.)</span></div>
<div id="lyrics_text" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div id="lyrics_text" style="text-align: center;">
<i>Deck the halls with rows of selfies.<br />
Tra-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la<br />
Clear the sculptures from the shelfies.<br />
Tra-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la<br />
Don we now our clay apparel<br />
Tra-la-la, la-la-la, la-la-la.<br />
Wash those tables 'til they're sterile<br />
Tra-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la.<br /><br />
See the glazing crawl before us.<br />
Tra-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la<br />
Strike a wound and hold back a cuss.<br />
Tra-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la<br />
Wallow deep in worried horror.<br />
Tra-la-la, la-la-la, la-la-la.<br />
While we cringe at all the error.<br />
Tra-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la<br /><br />
Fast the days and weeks they pass us.<br />
Tra-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la<br />
Hail your clay work, lads and lasses<br />
Tra-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la<br />
Sing we joyous, all together.<br />
Tra-la-la, la-la-la, la-la-la.</i></div>
<div id="lyrics_text" style="text-align: center;">
<i>Now you a gift for your mother.<br />
Tra-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la</i></div>
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<br /></div>
<div id="lyrics_text" style="text-align: justify;">
<b>True story</b>: This afternoon a teacher was picking her class up, when she asked to speak with me in the hall, privately. My mind was whirling, running down the list of possible suspects she wanted to discuss. Instead, she secretively asked me, "Will we be finishing anything up soon that we can wrap up as gifts." "Ummm..." I responded, "no." "Oh, well, I hate having the kids make something. I guess I'll figure it out. Maybe you can for Mother's Day." </div>
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<br /></div>
<div id="lyrics_text" style="text-align: justify;">
Yeah, I'll get right on that.</div>
<div id="lyrics_text">
<br /></div>
<div id="lyrics_text">
In case you missed it the first time around, <a href="http://artteachershateglitter.blogspot.com/2011/12/twelve-days-of-pre-christmas.html">2011's Holiday Carol</a>.</div>
<div id="lyrics_text" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div id="lyrics_text" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-size: x-small;">*What's that? It's the day before Thanksgiving and 8 students are absent? Whatever, game day! What's that? There's a concert on Thursday morning and another one at the same time next week? Whatever, guess we'll finish our work <i>after</i> break. What's that? The students are super squirrely and can't contain themselves? Whatever, free choice day! What's that? You're crunched for time and want me to have the students make a holiday gift? Yeah, no, I don't care, it's not happening. </span></div>
Aprilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00429718256691772971noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4491792612796400333.post-24419956410311587962013-11-19T21:13:00.001-05:002013-11-19T21:13:29.442-05:00Overheard in the Art Room II<div style="text-align: justify;">
My second graders were working on cutting out a shape man so they could practice positioning the human body for a cut paper collage. I was walking around... singing a song... no, not really, but I was walking around, helping the students and eavesdropping on their conversations, which is <i>always</i> a great idea...</div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Male Student: "Girls have babies."</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Female Student 1: "But they get special medicine."</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Male Student: "They still suffer."</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Female Student 2: "Some of them suffer."</div>
</blockquote>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
And later, at a different table...</div>
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<div style="text-align: justify;">
Male Student: "Mine doesn't even look like a hip. It looks like a nip."</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Female Student: "What's a nip?"</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Male Student: "I don't know, but I'm calling it a nip."</div>
</blockquote>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
I die.</div>
Aprilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00429718256691772971noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4491792612796400333.post-68161894047320590132013-11-18T13:22:00.001-05:002013-11-18T13:22:56.738-05:00You're A Bully<div style="text-align: justify;">
Maybe. Possibly. It's likely, is all I'm saying.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Recently, the powers that be at our school were made aware of some cyberbullying that was taking place amongst our sixth grade girls. From what I'm told, it was pretty vicious. A meeting took place with the administration, the counselors, and the sixth grade girls. Conversations were had. I was not there. I did, however, hear from an adult who was present that there was a point in which one of the girls made an astute observation and raised a question along the lines of, "but isn't that what we do to celebrities?"</div>
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<br /></div>
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Touche, young grasshopper. Touche. </div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Yes, this<i> is</i> what we do to celebrities. Every day. All you have to do is turn on the "news" or skim the tabloids in the checkout aisle at the supermarket to realize that we <i>do</i> do this to celebrities. We spread gossip, we say negative things about them, we pick on them for who they're dating, the clothes they wear, what they look like. And it's not limited to "news" headlines. Tweets, Facebook posts, blog comments... it's everywhere. There are entire shows dedicated to slamming celebrities. But it's okay, right? I mean, celebrities "deserve it". You might even say they're "asking for it" because they chose that career. And heck, it's not like you even know them. It's not like they're ever going to read what you say about them, or hear what you say, so where's the harm, right? </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Except that it is harmful. Even to celebrities, and especially to sixth grade girls.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
This harks back on a point I've tried to make during every bullying conversation I get dragged into. Kids learn it from somewhere, and until we figure out where, and curb <i>that</i> behavior, no anti-bullying campaign is ever going to end bullying. End of story. When we engage in bullying behavior towards <i>anyone</i>, it gives the message that it is okay to do. End of story.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
The bullying epidemic isn't going to be stopped by schools or teachers. Anti-bullying campaigns in schools aren't going to end bullying. Heck, parents don't even have the power to end it (as much as we teachers would like to place a lot of the blame on them). Society needs to end it. Until we clean up our act as a society, until we stop putting others down, until we stop reveling in the misfortune of others, bullying amongst school age children is going to continue to happen. We, as an adult society, are modeling for them how to do it, and we, as an adult society, need to clean up our act.</div>
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<br /></div>
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Unfortunately, the reality of it is, this problem may be too big and too widespread for us, as a society, to change. Media gives the people what they want, and the people want drama and trash and to feel better about themselves by looking down on others who may be more fortunate. I get that. Maybe we do need to work smaller. Maybe it does need to start in the home and in the schools. But not through an anti-bullying campaign, rather through the modeling of good, decent human behavior. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
I consider myself to be a good, decent human being, but I've engaged in bullying behavior in the past. I bet there are very few of us who can say that we never have. I'll tell you what though, I'm going to try my hardest to make sure that my daughter never hears me put down another human being, celebrity or not. She will never hear me make fun of someone else just so I can feel better about myself. I will do my best to teach her that cyberbullying, media bullying and play yard bullying (if that still exists) is wrong, regardless of who the target is.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
But that's just me, and this is just my two cents. </div>
Aprilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00429718256691772971noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4491792612796400333.post-19169871359116936122013-10-10T20:49:00.000-04:002013-10-10T20:49:50.922-04:00And He Was So Matter-of-Fact About It.<div style="text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZuoiQA21rVBpYza85F0RbuucYQOewVexagip8kUNVArq9ROsxRpujChfRML4ExjlD5ClcHFqr9AHHRQtz3-WGD9ukUcTzWPghqWDo1vZ6pHicIkA2WfTOApYGyx2il_awCFrYEvBIgvQ/s1600/fotor_138145213532697.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZuoiQA21rVBpYza85F0RbuucYQOewVexagip8kUNVArq9ROsxRpujChfRML4ExjlD5ClcHFqr9AHHRQtz3-WGD9ukUcTzWPghqWDo1vZ6pHicIkA2WfTOApYGyx2il_awCFrYEvBIgvQ/s400/fotor_138145213532697.jpg" width="257" /></a>
</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>"I drew my sister with her belly button. My sister's fat."</i></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
- First Grader, explaining his family portrait to me<br />
</div>
Aprilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00429718256691772971noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4491792612796400333.post-6634849906317660552013-09-26T22:04:00.000-04:002013-10-10T20:50:15.413-04:00Cheeky.<div style="text-align: justify;">
My fifth graders come to me directly from the library, so they're always bringing stacks of books with them (love!). Today, while the students were working, I was perusing their selections. I commented to one table that I miss reading every day. The following exchange then took place:</div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<b>Student A</b>: "My mom stays up until midnight reading."</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<b>Me</b>: "I stay up until midnight grading art work."</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<b>Student B</b>: "Well, that's what teachers do."</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<i>[crickets]</i></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<b>Student B</b>: "No offense."
</div>
</blockquote>
<i>[Crickets]</i>
Aprilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00429718256691772971noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4491792612796400333.post-7441450954114917642013-09-22T21:18:00.000-04:002013-09-22T21:18:40.930-04:00Pinterest Funnies<div style="text-align: justify;">
It shouldn't come to any surprise that my Pinterest feed contains art lessons. Many enjoyable art lessons, which are accompanied by beautiful photographs of student artwork. But imagine my surprise when my feed this evening presented the images and lessons below.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAnTyuyBcXQAgLZsKmrdYzY7ITktlUQSrYZi2pMAn3EEnANhtLYCr2c2e06VZCbZ8_MtGUmLimjyvkFudWlRUQYQusb_wpNTbcOjs1KxOKJkMMZXYxG5uvrNMLbjclR1Mn_BK3jnA8HBA/s1600/How_to_draw_bubble_letter_T_webpage-440x314.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="285" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAnTyuyBcXQAgLZsKmrdYzY7ITktlUQSrYZi2pMAn3EEnANhtLYCr2c2e06VZCbZ8_MtGUmLimjyvkFudWlRUQYQusb_wpNTbcOjs1KxOKJkMMZXYxG5uvrNMLbjclR1Mn_BK3jnA8HBA/s400/How_to_draw_bubble_letter_T_webpage-440x314.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><a href="http://www.graffitidiplomacy.com/BubbleLettersLesson1.html">How To Draw Bubble Letters</a> by Graffiti Diplomacy</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgH1KVqsRBKNVDHgiErTulqpR2IPlKOsr8v89RVLsXn9UIOlOsGVM6a7b_8MPgAQTsA80oxZdD2zcFYXKwJ1DrW39pICmWwXQQGpborH_lt4DvHyQWayMxB9Z-sOdzStuvVDuCByyH44D0/s1600/841b5a8ac6406c89612f2b0d0c0904fc.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="388" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgH1KVqsRBKNVDHgiErTulqpR2IPlKOsr8v89RVLsXn9UIOlOsGVM6a7b_8MPgAQTsA80oxZdD2zcFYXKwJ1DrW39pICmWwXQQGpborH_lt4DvHyQWayMxB9Z-sOdzStuvVDuCByyH44D0/s400/841b5a8ac6406c89612f2b0d0c0904fc.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: x-small;">(Pinterest couldn't provide me with a source to this, but it was too good not to share)</span></div>
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It's not just me, right? You guys see it too, right? RIGHT?</div>
Aprilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00429718256691772971noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4491792612796400333.post-76057168073724055292013-09-14T23:29:00.000-04:002013-09-14T23:29:20.164-04:00A Parody. If you will.<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
FirstGraders. FirstGrade-ers. Calm-challenged carriers of chaos. Innocent, distract-ed, clamorous hellions. Un-learn... ing. Un-work... ing. Un-able... ed? "I need that back," he howled into her right ear like a garbageman going to a trashcan that has no garbage... except the rubbish of his art. I am foiled. It's really hard. This <a href="http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/So_I_Married_an_Axe_Murderer">parody</a>... sucks.</div>
</blockquote>
Aprilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00429718256691772971noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4491792612796400333.post-76521156761089910732013-09-09T23:27:00.000-04:002013-09-09T23:27:53.891-04:00Back to School 101: Navigating the Hallway<div style="text-align: justify;">
<div style="text-align: left;">
</div>
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/e/e3/Hitane_Elementary_School_hallway_1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/e/e3/Hitane_Elementary_School_hallway_1.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: xx-small;"><i>By Douglas P Perkins (Own work) via
Wikimedia Commons</i></span></div>
</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
School is in full swing here, and, I imagine, everywhere else. For some of us, going back to school has become routine, whether it's our fourteenth year or our fourth. For some of us, this may be an entirely new experience. Regardless of what year of teaching this is for you, the beginning of the school year can come with a lot of adjustments, road blocks, and awkward moments. Lucky for you, I'm here with some lifesaving tips on how to avoid some very awkward moments. More specifically, how to avoid those awkward moments while <i>Navigating the Hallway</i> <span style="font-size: small;">[cue ominous echoing sound effect]</span>. <br />
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I'm not talking about how to crowd surf your way through the corridors of your school while avoiding the aromatic mosh pits of hormone addled tweens and teens. No, I'm talking about how to survive those uncomfortable moments when you're strolling down a presumably empty hallway and encounter <i>Another Adult</i> <span style="font-size: small;">[cue dun dun dun sound effect]</span>. You may be one of those super outgoing, socially capable, gets-along-with-everyone types, and good for you. This post isn't for you. This post is for those of us who sweat a little when put on the spot, those of us who stutter when speaking in front of adults, and those of us who carefully craft routes through the school to avoid any troublesome encounters. Maybe you're one of those art teachers who is never in the hallway, aside from when you arrive and exit the building. Good for you. This post isn't for you either. This post is for those of us who have to pee nine times a day, those of us who travel to the other side of the building to access our supply closets, and, those of us who, for whatever reason, just find ourselves in the hallway during the middle of the day.</div>
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Shall we get to it?</div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><b><span id="goog_2011438928"></span><span id="goog_2011438929"></span>Art Teachers Hate Glitter's Guide to Navigating the Hallway</b></span></div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span id="goog_2011438923"></span><span id="goog_2011438924"></span>It's inevitable. At some point in your career, you're going to find yourself waking down a hallway. Odds are, while you're walking down this hallway, you're going to encounter another human being. Not just another human being, but another <i>adult</i> human being. These encounters usually warrant some sort of human interaction. If you're lucky, it's the beginning of the day and a simple, "Good morning. How are you?" should suffice. Even if it's the middle of the day you can get by with a, "Hey. How's it going? Thank goodness the day's almost over, huh?" The end of the day is safe too, what with idle chatter like, "How'd your day go? See you tomorrow," and, "Thank god that's over. Have a good night!" at your disposal. But if the gods are against you, then the chances are good that you'll be running into the same person every time you leave your room. In this case, that stockpile of flippant chit chat isn't going to cut it. There's only so many times you can ask someone how their day is going before it gets old. Trust me. Here's how I recommend you deal with these situations.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<b>Avoid Eye Contact</b></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
It's best not to look the other person in the eye. Always keep your head down while walking. Count the tiles. Take note of the interesting textures of the floor. Admire your freshly polished toesies. Whatever you do, <i>don't look up</i>. Once you make eye contact with the other adult, you're obligated to interact with them. I understand, in some cases, avoiding eye contact is easier said than done. Maybe you're happily jaunting down the hallway, reveling in its quiet emptiness, you round the corner, and <i>shit!</i> You've unwittingly locked eyes with another adult at the end of the hall. Now what?</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<b>Bring A Prop</b></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Always, always, always bring a prop whenever you leave the sanctity of your art room. This way, after the obligatory head nod, you can look away and focus on your prop. This is totally acceptable. Be aware though, it is important to choose your prop wisely. A clipboard of papers is the perfect prop. You can study it intently without the fear of interruption. Obviously it's important that you get this information <i>right now</i>. Other teachers understand this. Our days are busy. We multitask. </div>
</blockquote>
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<div style="text-align: justify;">
Art supplies are good too. No one's going to engage you in conversation when you're carrying a bucket of dirty paintbrushes or a teetering tower of glazes, lest you ask them for help. Non art teachers hate touching icky art supplies. That's a fact. Why do you think they're always sending students to your room in search of pom poms and paint? </div>
</blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Student artwork is a gray area. Yes, transporting student artwork requires your undivided attention, thus rendering you incapable of small talk, however, you may be forced into conversation anyways. The other adult might actually ask you about the work. Don't hold this against them; they're just trying to survive the awkwardness of the hallway encounter too. Thankfully, should you be questioned about the work, you have now been provided with the perfect opening to engage the other adult in a conversation about clay techniques and why scoring and welding are so crucial. But what happens if you left your room and forgot to bring your prop?</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<b>Grab A Student</b></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
The hallways are very attractive to students. Students can't resist the alluring call of an empty hallway. A student is bound to wander into your path and save the day. When one does, engage the student in greetings and conversation. Once the other adult has passed, you're now free to continue on your merry way. But what's that? You're patiently waiting for a student to appear, but there are none in sight, and you're beginning to panic? Stay calm. With some quick thinking you can come up with an excuse to pop into the closest classroom and "borrow" a student. Don't worry, other teachers do this <i>all</i> the time. Now you can safely converse with the student while the other adult passes by. But what happens when you're traversing the one hallway with no students <i>or</i> classrooms in sight?</div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<b>Use Humor</b> </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
I'm not asking you to make jokes. Heaven knows <i>that</i> isn't going to go well for anyone. If you have no other options available you're going to have to put yourself out there and provide some comedic relief. Trip. Stumble up the stairs (stairwells are just an extension of a hallway). Lose a shoe. Pass gas. Whatever route you choose, you both can laugh about your gaffe and move on with a smile. And bonus! Now you have something to talk about the <i>next</i> time you run into each other, "Hey, remember that time I let one rip? That was a doozy, huh? Guess I better cut back on the ole fiber, eh?" Please note, this follow-up scenario is only good for one encounter. Using it more than once is just sad.</div>
</blockquote>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
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Regardless of how you choose to survive the hallway encounter, remember, if you can't think of anything pertinent, and semi-intelligent to say, Don't. Say. Anything. At. All. A poorly constructed sentence of incoherent and disconnected words can only make things worse. You want to leave the other adult feeling good about your meetup and not wondering, "Is she on medication?" </div>
Aprilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00429718256691772971noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4491792612796400333.post-34976310284232341132013-09-01T22:36:00.002-04:002013-09-01T22:36:35.000-04:00A Few of My Favorite Things: Classroom Must-Haves<div style="text-align: justify;">
<i>(I totally meant to have this posted a few weeks ago, long before returning to school, and certainly still in August, as the opening line suggests. However, between birthdays, a going away get together, play dates, a wedding and a root canal, it just didn't happen.)</i></div>
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It's <strike>August</strike> September. Which means it's time to start preparing to return to school (I realize <strike>some of you</strike> all of us are already back in the swing of things). Just for fun, I thought I would gather together a collection of some of my favorite things. All of the items below are things that I use in my classroom, or at home. <span style="font-size: x-small;">(At this point I will note, I have not been compensated in any way for this post.)</span></div>
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1. <a href="http://www.timetimer.com/">Time Timer</a><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgRXATPTq4fKAcb1zPumnL3AkZDmI9lfqO8PXpNcnjD1MGHBtSB-6M6xpdRWkQXbb0PISjPgTTq9ntGEY8j6Q2-2eat-h61T29ENAvY5RPb0iiWXRqHYp30_BZHRhyphenhyphenByv83t6bcjTjuFuM/s1600/8488416321_fbabe393ea.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="316" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgRXATPTq4fKAcb1zPumnL3AkZDmI9lfqO8PXpNcnjD1MGHBtSB-6M6xpdRWkQXbb0PISjPgTTq9ntGEY8j6Q2-2eat-h61T29ENAvY5RPb0iiWXRqHYp30_BZHRhyphenhyphenByv83t6bcjTjuFuM/s320/8488416321_fbabe393ea.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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I love, love, love this timer. I was first introduced to it through <a href="http://www.theartofed.com/">The Art of Education</a> when they were hosting a giveaway about a year ago. I didn't win the giveaway, but I loved the idea of this timer so much that I purchased one for my classroom. This is probably one of the best classroom purchases I've ever made. I set it at the start of class (and if I don't remember, my students are eager to remind me), and it allows students to monitor class time on their own, without having to ask how much time they have left.</div>
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This timer is a great classroom management tool. I often overhear students telling each other, "Shhh. You're wasting our art time. Look at the red!" It also helps with clean-up, because the students know that when the red gets to "5" (or "10", depending on the materials we're using), it's time to stop working and clean-up. And bonus, I no longer have to watch the clock and remember what time the students came in, and what time they're leaving (this is especially good if you work at multiple schools with different start times.)</div>
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2. <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Beautiful-Oops-Barney-Saltzberg/dp/076115728X">Beautiful Oops</a></div>
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<a href="http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51-SwwBZvvL._SX260_PJlook-inside-v2,TopRight,1,0_SH20_.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51-SwwBZvvL._SX260_PJlook-inside-v2,TopRight,1,0_SH20_.jpg" /></a></div>
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A couple of years ago, when I was out on maternity leave, my fabulous sub read this book at the start of the school year. I hadn't previously heard of it, but I was so grateful to her for having read it to my students. For the rest of the year, anytime students made a "mistake," their peers were quick to remind them that they could turn it into a beautiful oops. Unfortunately, when my sub left, she took the book with her, but I was sure to pick up my own copy for my classroom.</div>
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For more art room books must-haves, check out <a href="http://www.theartofed.com/2013/08/29/10-books-every-art-teacher-needs/">this list</a> from The Art of Education.</div>
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3. <a href="http://www.shakeitupamerica.net/#">Etch A Sketch</a><br />
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Remember these? I picked a couple Etch A Sketches up <i>years</i> ago at TJMaxx for my classroom (one of them has since been stolen). I was shocked by what a hit these were. Students who aren't normally into art love drawing on these. There is always a fight over the one Etch A Sketch in my classroom, which is why I used some PTO funds to purchase some more this year. If you can, you should definitely get a couple of these. They make great "I'm finished!" activities. You'll be amazed by what the students can produce. I once had an <i>elementary</i> student who was capable of very accurately replicating buildings in the community on an Etch A Sketch. Without the aid of a photo. In under 20 minutes. Needless to say, his peers and I were blown away. In fact, his mom informed me that an Etch A Sketch was the only thing he had asked for for Christmas. </div>
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Want to see some amazing Etch A Sketch artwork? Check out this artist, <a href="http://bryanetch.blogspot.com/">Bryan Etch</a> (I know this artist, and I can tell you from personal experience that he throws some fab parties).</div>
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4. <a href="http://www.anthropologie.com/anthro/product/search/073675.jsp?cm_vc=SEARCH_RESULTS">Teacher pencils</a></div>
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Not to be confused with teacher pens. I know some of you don't mind sharing pencils with the students, and you probably think it's just easier that way. Good for you. I need my own pencils (hello, germs!), and I need them to be easily identifiable as mine. I picked up this set from <a href="http://www.anthropologie.com/anthro/index.jsp">Anthropologie</a>, but you can find funky pencils anywhere. Or make your own. I half expected my special pencils to go walking, but I was pleasantly surprised when they never did. In fact, I only went through two of these last year! How awesome is that? Anytime I misplaced my pencil, or left it on a table, students were very quick to return it to me. I make a big deal about never starting class without my pencil, so my students are always helping me keep track of it.</div>
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5. <a href="http://www.crayola.com/products/24-ct-mini-twistable-crayons-product/">Crayola Twistables Crayons</a></div>
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<a href="http://www.crayola.com/products/24-ct-mini-twistable-crayons-product/~/media/Crayola/Products/529724.jpg?mh=583&mw=667" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://www.crayola.com/products/24-ct-mini-twistable-crayons-product/~/media/Crayola/Products/529724.jpg?mh=583&mw=667" width="164" /></a></div>
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I don't actually use these in my classroom, but I'm thinking about it. We have these at home, and they are great for my two-year old. She is <i>intense</i> when it comes to crayons with paper wrappers. She will sit there and peel off every little bit of paper from her crayons. And if she can't get the paper off, guess who gets stuck doing it? I picked up a pack of Twistables for a long car trip, and I haven't looked back. No more peeling paper!<br />
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<b>So there you have it. A few of my favorite classroom items. What are your must-haves in your classroom? Are there any products that you just can't live without? </b></div>
Aprilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00429718256691772971noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4491792612796400333.post-12363555476626298472013-06-25T20:49:00.000-04:002013-06-25T20:49:46.674-04:005 Things I Learned While "Attending" the AOE 2013 Online Conference<div style="text-align: justify;">
Today I "attended" the Art of Education's 2013 Online Conference. I use the word <i>attend</i> loosely because, well, it's not like I had to <i>go</i> anywhere. This was my first ever conference; the content was great, the presenters were stellar, and the folks over at AOE definitely deserve some mad props. I "took home" a lot of great content from the conference, but I also, inadvertently, learned, or was reminded of, some other things while participating in the conference.</div>
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<b>1. My art room is boring.</b></div>
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This is something I more or less already knew, but guys, my art room is dull. Some of the presenters filmed their videos in their classrooms, and man, what fun looking places! In my defense, a lot of outside factors have contributed to my boring art room, but ultimately, the blame rests on me. Time to step things up. Fingers crossed, here's hoping I'll be in a bigger room next year.</div>
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<b>2. I can't sit still for long periods of time.</b></div>
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And by "long periods of time," I mean an hour. This is one of the reasons teaching art appeals to me. I've had other jobs in other fields, and I've always done my best in an environment where a lot of change is occurring and there is a high level of energy. Sitting in front of a computer for extended periods of time just doesn't work for me. I also do poorly in staff meetings and other professional development presentations and classes. Thank goodness the content is available for attendees online. It's good to know I can go back and view what I missed at my pace.</div>
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<b>3. My attention span is nearly nonexistent.</b></div>
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While attending the conference, I was also folding laundry, eating lunch, catching up on episodes of Fringe, window shopping online, and reapplying for my current job. And that was only during the first hour.</div>
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<b>4. I need to become more involved.</b></div>
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I feel like I've been slacking when it comes to my level of involvement within the art education community. I need to put myself out there more. Humor blogging is one thing, but I was very inspired by the presenters, and I realized that I want to expand my involvement in our profession. Now, how do I go about doing this?</div>
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<b>5. Students (and parents) are capable of more than I give them credit for.</b></div>
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A lot of you have your students and parent volunteers tackle tasks that you just don't have time for. I've been meaning to put more content up online or create an online gallery, but have never had the time. Why not have a parent do it? I was very inspired by some of the presenters who used students in demonstration videos. I could have students photograph artwork for online galleries. I could have older students create samples for lessons for the younger students. The possibilities are endless. And here I thought students were only good for pencil sharpening and chair stacking.</div>
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<i><b>What did you "take home" from the AOE 2013 Online Conference?</b></i></div>
Aprilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00429718256691772971noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4491792612796400333.post-11141074752542121912013-06-13T23:14:00.000-04:002013-06-13T23:14:35.211-04:00"Gym Teachers in Love"<div style="text-align: justify;">
<i>It's all fun and games, until gym teachers fall in love.</i></div>
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Apparently.</div>
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Twice a year, I bust out a popular boxed drawing game to play with my students. The last week of school happens to be one of the times I bring this game out. The students love it, I get a kick out of it, and good fun is had by all. Until this week. If you follow Art Teachers Hate Glitter on Facebook, then you've already heard part of the story. Here's what I posted earlier this evening:</div>
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<span class="userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">For
Your Consideration: It's the last day of art and you're playing a
Pictionary-esque game with your AP 3rd grade class. You pull a subject
card that reads, "Gym teachers in love." Do you a) think it's silly and
let your students draw it because it's all in good fun and they'll get a
kick out of it, or b) think it's inappropriate and controversial and
banish it to the back of the box?</span></blockquote>
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The responses were essentially divided into two camps, what's-the-big-deal, and why-poke-the-bear, which is exactly what I expected. As <i>you </i>can probably expect, there's more to the story than the small little blurb I posted to Facebook. </div>
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I play a modified version of the Pictionary-style game, Luck of the Draw, with my 3rd-6th graders. The students are given a subject, which I've read from a card I've pulled out of the "subject" box (and selected for comprehension and humor). They then have a minute to draw the subject. After the minute, the drawings are shared with their table anonymously (or as anonymous as elementary students can be). The students then vote for the drawing that they feel best fits a selected category card. It's silly, it's fun, and students of all artistic abilities have a chance of getting their drawings selected as a "winner". For the last round of the game, I like to select a really fun subject that will get the students roaring with laughter. Sometimes it's "hamsters juggling," sometimes it's "a moose in the house," and sometimes, it's "gym teachers in love." </div>
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Until this week, it never occurred to me that "gym teachers in love" was an inappropriate or controversial subject to give students to draw. The response to this subject has always been giggles, mixed with some "ews" and drawings that show two adults with hearts over their heads. Well, for the first time ever, a student took this somewhere it shouldn't have gone. Somewhere I never expected a third grader to take it, and in surprisingly shocking detail. It was a big deal. Administration and counselors got involved. It was ugly.</div>
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I later approached the AP who handled this situation to find out how things had ended. The whole thing had been very emotional, I was actually very upset by the ordeal, and I wanted to make sure that the student was okay. Little did I know, but I was about to be thrown under the bus.</div>
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It was implied that I was to blame for why the drawing was made, which, okay, had I not chosen that subject, the picture never would have happened. Fair enough, but in my mind, there was a bigger issue at hand. Why is a third grader drawing such detailed images that are not developmentally appropriate for his age? It quickly became evident that I was the only one who felt that this was the most pressing concern. It was suggested that the subject I asked the students to draw was inappropriate because of everything kids see on TV nowadays. Apparently "love," something that we teach our children about since the day they are born, something that is interwoven into many human relationships, is a rated R topic. You know, because that's what kids see on TV, that ever present instigator and fall-guy for every bad thing anyone anywhere has ever done*.</div>
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It was alluded that the subject was controversial because <i>gym teachers are often accused of doing bad things</i>. Hold the phone. So, if the subject had been "science teachers in love," or "music teachers in love," that would have been okay? So because the subject was specifically about gym teachers <i>in love</i>, that automatically pushes it into unsafe territory? Why, because gym teachers are evil and dangerous? What, are gym teachers not allowed to be in love? What if it had just been "gym teachers"? Or "in love"? What if I had asked students to draw "love"? Would that be wrong too? </div>
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Since when has "love" become an inappropriate and controversial thing to talk about and ask our students to consider in their art work? I ask students to draw family portraits. Is this inappropriate because <i>bad things often happen in families</i>? I ask students to draw pictures of themselves with a friend. We discuss relationships and body language and how you can tell that two people are friends just by looking at them. Kids draw themselves with their arms around their friends. They draw themselves holding hands. Is this inappropriate?</div>
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I'm still confused by the backlash that occurred because of this one drawing that this one student drew. I'm shocked that anyone would suggest that I'm asking my students to do inappropriate things. I'm amazed that the focus has been turned around on me and taken away from the student who could really use some attention and help. I think I just got my first real taste of the anti-teacher vibe that exists now. If this is truly the state of education, that teachers are blamed for the actions of their students, then I don't know if I want to be a part of that anymore. </div>
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What are your thoughts?</div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">*It's interesting to note that while I wrote this, the TV was on and a commercial came on about Love. The commercial showed many different demonstrations of people showing love for each other, and it was all rated G. Or maybe hugging and kissing children and grandparents is PG? R? I just don't know anymore.</span></div>
Aprilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00429718256691772971noreply@blogger.com16tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4491792612796400333.post-79611016426585304072013-05-01T21:51:00.000-04:002013-05-01T21:55:18.573-04:00The Beginning of the Year vs. The End of the Year<div style="text-align: justify;">
We're approaching the most wonderful time in the school year. That time we've been looking forward to ever since we walked through the doors back in August/September. Yup, that's right, the end of the school year. That glorious time of the year when students and teachers alike come to the mutual, unspoken agreement that no one gives a f* anymore, so let's let it all hang out.</div>
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Don't pretend like you don't know what I'm talking about. You know. Oh yes, you. know. A lot has happened this year. You've dealt with a lot this year. You're feeling the weariness. The exhaustion. The effects of being beat down by administration, colleagues, parents and students. And ultimately, things... have... <i>changed</i> from the start of the school year to the end. </div>
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Let's compare, shall we? </div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><i>(Tip: Open the image below in a new tab and you'll be able to zoom in)</i></span></div>
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<b>What do you think? Are you ready for The End of the School Year yet?</b></div>
Aprilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00429718256691772971noreply@blogger.com16tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4491792612796400333.post-56844426301558995022013-04-20T20:46:00.002-04:002013-04-20T20:47:24.178-04:00Human Biology 101: 1st Grader Edition<div style="text-align: justify;">
A couple of weeks ago I took my first graders outside for art. We were engaged in a drawing scavenger hunt. The students were tasked with drawing any natural things that they could find. The following conversation took place between me, an intellectually advanced first grader, and a, um, not-so intellectually advanced first grader (but an oh-so, gosh-darn cute one):</div>
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<b>FG1:</b> "Are humans natural?"<br />
<b>Me: </b>"Well, we're not man-made, are we?"<br />
<b>FG1</b> <i>(an intense look of deep thought overtakes his face)</i><b>:</b> Um.....<br />
<b>Me</b><i> (cutting him off before he could counter that, yes, in fact, one could argue that humans are technically man-made)</i><b>:</b> "Okay, well, it doesn't require any tools or machines to make us, right?"<br />
<b>FG1:</b> "No."<br />
<b>Me:</b> "Well, then humans are natural!"<br />
<b>FG2: </b> "But, tools are used."<br />
<b>Me:</b> "They are?"<br />
<b>FG2:</b> "Yeah. You need a knife to cut the girl's stomach open to get the baby out."</blockquote>
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And with that I chose to exit the conversation and walk away. I didn't really see it as my place to get into the birth of babies with a couple of first graders. </div>
Aprilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00429718256691772971noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4491792612796400333.post-41117745627947259672013-03-19T21:00:00.000-04:002013-03-19T21:00:37.349-04:00Dear Followers,<div style="text-align: justify;">
Dear Followers,</div>
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I'd like to take this moment to address a few... <i>housekeeping</i> items, if you don't mind. First off, welcome to my new followers. I am continuously amazed that I have 8 followers, let alone 800 <i>(hi, Facebook friends!)</i>. I really enjoy providing my comrades in arms some humor and a place to feel like <i>someone else gets it</i>. I wish I could post new content more frequently, but, <i>*sigh*</i>, being funny is hard work at times. Especially during years like this one when there are so many changes happening all at once. But enough about that.</div>
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Second, a note about Google Reader. You probably already know this, but Google Reader will no longer exist come July 2013. If you use Google Reader to follow this blog, well, sucks to be you. Not really, because you can now switch over to Bloglovin' and follow ATHG there. There's a handy dandy little button over there... on the... right... wait a minute.... wait for it... and... there it is. Right over there below my Twitter follow button. What? You didn't know ATHG was on Twitter? I am. Feel free to follow ATHG, but don't get too excited, I don't tweet often.</div>
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Speaking of not getting too excited, if you happen to follow ATHG on Pinterest, you may have noticed that I don't "pin" very often (or ever). There's a reason for that. I can't remember my login info. I know, I know, I can reset it and stuff, but with an 18 month at home, who has time? I hope to someday beef up those boards, but in the meantime, don't hold your breath.</div>
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In related news, I currently don't have access to my email, so if you've emailed me in the past, oh, two months. I, uh, didn't get it. Again, I know I can resolve this issue with about 15-20 minutes of work, but, *<i>sigh*</i>, ugh. If you want to get in touch with ATHG, message me on Facebook.</div>
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Hmmm... that is all. I guess I must be doing something right, because you're all still with me, and more and more of you are joining every week. Thank you for that. Here's hoping I start stepping things up soon, <i>amiright</i>? </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Sincerely,</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Ms. Art Teachers Hate Glitter</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
</div>
Aprilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00429718256691772971noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4491792612796400333.post-17289677835440657642013-03-07T23:03:00.000-05:002013-03-07T23:03:09.497-05:00Give Me 5!<div style="text-align: justify;">
A quick look at the clock shows that you have five minutes until the next class arrives. Five minutes. No worries. You've got this. You pop out of your classroom and quickly head to the other end of the school to use the faculty bathroom. Next you skip downstairs, check your mailbox, zip into the storage closet and grab a piece of 22x28" railroad board. Now it's back upstairs to your cohorts art room so you can use the paper cutter. Along the way you remind a 6th grade student to grab his clay sculpture from your room later. After slicing and dicing your way through that railroad board, it's back to your classroom. Another glance at the clock tells you that you still have a couple of minutes before the 1st graders arrive, so you quickly check your email, finish setting up some supplies, and do a quick pick-up of trash. In two lightening fast moves, you pull out your ponytail holder and redo your top knot. Bam! Your five minutes are up. You are all set and ready to begin 1st grade art. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Of course, they're five minutes late, and as you see them be-bopping down the hallway, you can't help but think of all the things you could have accomplished in those five minutes. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<i>What can you get done in five minutes?</i></div>
Aprilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00429718256691772971noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4491792612796400333.post-47213083070950641422013-02-27T21:15:00.000-05:002013-02-27T21:15:12.689-05:00Overheard in the Art Room <br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<i>"My closet is going to be the size of a poor person's bedroom." -</i>5th Grade Student</blockquote>
<br />
(Jaw, meet the floor. Floor, my jaw.) <br />
<br />
Aprilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00429718256691772971noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4491792612796400333.post-11480611850316090132013-02-20T20:30:00.000-05:002013-02-20T20:30:11.770-05:00I Know Why the Art Teacher Cries... because of paper cuts. And cardboard cuts.<br />
... because she just sat in a puddle of water. Again.<br />
... because it's only Wednesday, but it has felt like Thursday for two days now.<br />
... because she just stepped in green paint. Again.<br />
... because her clock won't stop buzzing, no matter how many times she beats it.<br />
... because working in a tiny octagonal room with no windows and 30 sixth graders triggers her claustrophobia.<br />
... because she's on bus duty and has realized that she left her gloves inside.<br />
... because she's on her way to her car and has realized that her gloves have been in her pocket all along.<br />
... because a 1st grader corrected her math.<br />
... because a 1st grader corrected her spelling.<br />
... because the Monster Mug she made looks less "monster" and more like something that could be questioned as, um, racist.<br />
... because a 2nd grader mocked her.<br />
... because her last class was a Level Three on the chocolate recovery scale.<br />
... because she forgot to fire the clay pieces her 4th graders were supposed to glaze.<br />
... because of the email from THAT parent.<br />
... because of the other email from that other parent.<br />
... because ________________________________.Aprilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00429718256691772971noreply@blogger.com39tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4491792612796400333.post-74712014096043171202013-02-13T22:53:00.001-05:002013-02-13T22:53:42.510-05:00You Can't Say That in the Art Room<b>Phrases and Questions I'd Like to Ban from My Art Room</b> <br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
"I can't."</blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
"But it doesn't look like yours."</blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
"Did I do this right?"</blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
"Can you do it for me?"</blockquote>
And my most recent biggest pet peeve...<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
"Is this good enough?" </blockquote>
What phrases and questions do you wish you could exile to far away lands? <br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
</blockquote>
Aprilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00429718256691772971noreply@blogger.com23tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4491792612796400333.post-76632135044706369792013-02-12T23:18:00.000-05:002013-02-12T23:18:55.206-05:00Dear 5th Grade Teacher<div style="text-align: justify;">
Dear 5th Grade Teacher,</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Hi. How ya' doin'? It's me, your friendly "neighborhood" art teacher. I feel it is important to keep classroom teachers informed, not only of good and bad behavior in the art room, but also of what their classes are doing in art, especially when it ties in with what is being taught in the regular classroom. I wanted to take a moment to commend you on how professional and polite you were during my summary of class this afternoon.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
When you arrived to pick your students up, and I began to fill you in on what your students were completing, your response really made me feel like the work that goes on in my art room is highly valued. I could really tell that you were listening and cared about what I was saying even though you managed to not once make eye contact with me while I was speaking. Some people might think that your responses of "uh-huh" and "yeah" meant you were distracted and not really paying attention, but not me. I know that your responses were given with the utmost consideration and that I did in fact have your undivided attention. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
I believe that connecting with and building a strong bond with students is vital in the school environment. I know that you truly believe the same, as was evident by your interaction with the 6th graders as they were walking past in the hallway. I noticed that while I was explaining to you how well your 5th grade students did in class today, you made every effort to interact with your former students. The way you sought out greetings and hugs from the 6th graders really shows that you care. So what if you missed my praise of your class' participation and discussion in art today? You obviously feel it is important to maintain a bond with your former students. And the way that you grabbed that one student around the shoulders and dragged him into the art room so that you could show him off to your current group of 5th graders and explain to them that <i>this</i> is the student whose work you are always displaying as stellar? Bravo. I know it must have made your current students happy to <i>finally</i> place a face with the name. And you know what? It didn't bother me one bit that you interrupted me to put on such a display. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Most teachers always seem to be in a hurry these days. Not you though. I really admired the way you had your class wait a few minutes in the art room while you stood in the hallway so as to not, I assume, exclude any former students, thus saving them hurt feelings. How very thoughtful of you, and I know that your current class really enjoyed those extra few minutes they spent standing in a quiet line in the art room. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
In conclusion, I'm so grateful for the <i>importance</i> that you place on the work that your students do in my room, and the time and attention you expend attentively listening to my reports on such. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Sincerely,</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Ms. ATHG</div>
Aprilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00429718256691772971noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4491792612796400333.post-1182776262572627192013-01-22T20:41:00.001-05:002013-01-22T20:41:45.330-05:00In the spirit of recent events, I present to you...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfh90ERtqm4d3rr6IOYh3k-dQ_-wh4e3gBUieWwGwDIZPCFQ_jh6b1IGpIK9VL0zOgJP3Y5L8G64c3qQKYWAQKPLDNmag__eWa5NpId2O-348K1ERQdJ5XLXFY6XkrbF4wab6V2Dw5hOM/s1600/fotor_135890356227923.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfh90ERtqm4d3rr6IOYh3k-dQ_-wh4e3gBUieWwGwDIZPCFQ_jh6b1IGpIK9VL0zOgJP3Y5L8G64c3qQKYWAQKPLDNmag__eWa5NpId2O-348K1ERQdJ5XLXFY6XkrbF4wab6V2Dw5hOM/s320/fotor_135890356227923.jpg" width="215" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
The Washington Monument.</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
You're welcome. </div>
Aprilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00429718256691772971noreply@blogger.com2